25 Jul Move over politicians – Let me fix the economy
Farage, Osbourne, Clegg, Miliband, Balls. They’re all hopeless!
Here’s my solution….
Dear Mr. Osbourne,
Please find below my suggestion for fixing Britain’s economy. Instead of giving billions of pounds to banks that will squander the money on lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan. You can call it the Platinum Practice Retirement Plan:
There are about 20 million people over 50 in the work force (that includes me). – Pay them £1 million apiece severance for early retirement with the following stipulations:
1) They MUST retire. Twenty million job openings – Unemployment fixed.
2) They MUST buy a new CAR. Twenty million cars ordered – Auto Industry fixed.
3) They MUST either buy a house or pay off their mortgage – Housing Crisis fixed.
4) They must send their kids to school / college / university / army – Crime rate fixed
5) Buy £50 of alcohol / tobacco a week – there’s your money back in duty / tax etc
It can’t get any easier than that!
P.S. If more money is needed, have all members of parliament pay back their falsely claimed expenses and second home allowances.
If you chooses to act on this, please wait until the Autumn Budget. Yes, indeed, you have correctly calculated. I am taking a week off in August.
Have a good Summer; enjoy the long evenings …
Your Fiscal Friend